God Hates Holland


(Head Heretic: So, I am reading my email yesterday and some person of limited experience pops off with this quote in response to my assertion that every religion, including Christianity coould and would attract a certain percentage of nutcases. Just like any ideology can and will. I mentioned the 700 club as a good place to get a look at the mentalist of the Christian supremacist in the warm and fuzzy mode. What was this genius of history’s response?

Emphasis mine:
“I watch the 700 club all the time. There is nothing totalitarian or remotely threatening about Christianity,
even the most fundamentalist strains of it.”

Now I would like to think that this person is simply ignorant but he goes on to assume I am some far Left Socialist anti-semitic…blah blah blah. The point is that I say there are SOME fools who use Christianity in a bad way and I am suddenly the attacker of an entire faith. Let me reiterate, ANYONE, Muslim, Christian, or Jew or ANYONE who thinks their ideology has NO evil people involved in it. Who think that somehow their sacred books protect them from hypocrites and power seekers is either profoundly and willingly ignorant or they are ONE OF THE SUPREMACISTS hiding in sheep’s clothes as they pursue their power games and ego trips.
Anyone who says there are NO dangerous groups associated with Christianity is just an evil soul themselves. Ditto Judaism, Islam, Buddhism Shinto Hindu WHATEVER ideology. Including Liberalism and Conservatism. ALL CAUSES CAN AND DO ATTRACT FUDGEHEADS!!!! Anyone who focuses more on the faults of others ideology’s and IGNORES the faults of their own has defaulted all moral high ground.

Critical Eye column by Perro de Jong

06-03-2009
Listen to Perro de Jong’s column

I’ve been trying to find out more about the funerals of the five Turkish passengers and crew who died tragically in the Amsterdam plane crash.

I imagine that the presence at those funerals of a bunch of big, burly Americans sporting sunglasses and cowboy hats wouldn’t exactly have gone unnoticed. Especially if they’d been brandishing billboards with the slogan “you are going to hell.”

So I’m guessing that members of the Westboro Baptist Church didn’t in the end travel from their headquarters in Topeka, Kansas to Istanbul, Turkey as they’d threatened to do in one of their pamphlets.

“Yes”, they said in the pamphlet, “we will picket their funerals in religious protest and warning. God hates the morally depraved and murderous Turkish Muslims.”

Cheering at funerals – particularly those of US soldiers who died in Iraq – is what Westboro pastor Fred Phelps, his wife Margie and their thirteen children became notorious for. It’s why documentary maker Louis Theroux once branded them “America’s most hated family.”

Filthy Dutch
But they’re nothing if not democratic: where the European Union is doing its damnest to keep Turkey out by hook or by crook, the Phelpses seem perfectly happy to welcome the Turks to their club of ‘people God hates’. Along with Americans, Swedes and of course with my fellow countrymen.

Actually, the Westboro Church was going to come to the Netherlands at first, to protest against the “morally depraved and filthy Dutch”. But then it became clear that no Dutch passengers had died in the plane crash.

So they had to improvise. Because the crux of the Phelpses’ unorthodox approach is that God’s will is made visible through the punishments He metes out. And what makes Him more furious than anything is tolerating homosexuality. That’s why “God Hates Sweden”, why “God Hates Turkey” and why “God Hates Holland.”

Actually, the Swedes even have their own website: www.godhatessweden.com. Which, if you ask me, is something of an insult. I mean, come on! Surely we’re more depraved here in the Netherlands than that bunch of Scandinavian goody two-shoes? Where’s our website?

Einstein
Anyway, it’s a philosophy…and as an avid student of quantum theory, who am I to discard it? For the scientists among you, the thing about quantum physics that irked the great Albert Einstein was that it’s so pragmatic it accepts just about any theory, however unlikely, as long as it is able to describe the facts correctly.

“God does not play dice” was Einstein’s famous retort. Ah, but the question is: has He been using the time he saves not playing dice to start wars and bring down planes?

And besides, it’s all terribly old hat really. I mean, God may hate Holland, but Allah beat him to it by at least eight years.

Holland Haters from Pakistan
I had to dig through my archives a bit, but let me quote to you from a letter that Radio Netherlands received back then. From Pervez Khan and Mohammed Hoffman, two Pakistani expats living in Germany who styled themselves “Holland Haters”.

“Dutch homosexuals and prostitutes of ‘Lying Radio Holland'”, the letter begins “immediately commence the course of a continuous barking like mad dogs against the Honourable Islamic Mujahideen and their glorious Jihad.”

The reasons – laid down in an exhaustive, eleven-point list – are that “nearly every Dutch woman is a prostitute and keeps a vibrator in the house”, “nearly every Dutch man is a homosexual” and “the dirty Dutch never shower and foreigners renting rooms are told that shower is only twice a week.”

I’ve often wondered what happened to good old Pervez. Thanks to a bit of creative googling I found out that these days, he and his wife are much too busy predicting the annihilation of India to concern themselves with such trifling matters as Dutch homosexuals.

Snubbed by Pervez Khan and ignored by the Westboro Baptist Church in favour of Turkey of all places. Somebody up there must really hate Holland…

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